For as long as I can remember, I’ve been hearing the common misconception that “communication is key.” I’m starting to think that’s not entirely true. I mean, yeah it’s something that’s really important when it comes to solving issues, but sometimes it doesn’t work. I see a lot of people so hung up on constantly trying to talk stuff out with people and “communicate” when they’re really going about it all wrong. If you still don’t get what I mean, keep reading and I’ll explain.
First and foremost, please understand that if you’re communicating wrong chances are you’re creating more problems. Fore instance, you can’t just yell at a person and expect them to be respectful to you. Treat the person you’re communicating with the exact same way you want them to treat you. You can’t expect them to want to hear anything you’re saying if you come off rude or disrespectful. No conversation should have to turn into an argument.
A lot of people seem to forget that when it comes to communicating, it’s not always what you say but how you say it. You can have the best intentions going into a conversation but the way you say something can make the message come out different than planned. Take your time to carefully think about exactly what it is you want to say so that you don’t have to come back and apologize for things later. And please don’t try to communicate with someone while you’re angry. Chances are you’ll say something that you didn’t mean and regret it later.
Another common misconception about communication is that more communication equals better communication. This can’t be further from the truth. If you’re going about communicating wrong, it can just make the issues you’re facing continue to get worse. Quality over quantity. Having one good conversation that clears up the issues you’re having is worth more than having ten conversations and the problem still persists.
Finally, just because you choose to communicate something to someone doesn’t mean they’re gonna be receptive to what you’re saying. If a person is stuck in their ways and doesn’t want change, it doesn’t matter if you talk to them a million times. They will not change. You can’t force anyone to listen to you no matter how badly you want them to. In some situations, people lack communication skills and are just plain stubborn. Something that I’ve noticed is when you stop caring about a situation with someone and just leave it alone that’s when the person tends to have a change of heart and really start hearing what you’re saying. You sometimes have to either wait for them to come around and really understand what you’re saying or just leave the situation alone completely.
Now, I’m not completely shooting down the idea of communicating to solve issues. I just want to point out that depending on how you go about it, bad communication isn’t always the solution and can sometimes make things worse. When you do decide to communicate with people, just make sure you’re doing your part to go about things the right way.
By Cierra Lemott, Senior, Brooks College Prep
Instagram & Snapchat: @cece.kodak